Oscar De La Jolla Has a Girlfriend!

OK, maybe the title of this blog post is not entirely accurate. What I really have is that someone has offered to be my girlfriend, so its basically a done deal.
I know what you're thinking. You want proof. Well, the proof is in the pudding. In this case, "pudding" means "e-mail." After a couple of chicks broke up with me via e-mail, it's nice to receive a relationship-building e-mail instead of a relationship-killing one.

OK, so technically the offer isn't for a girlfriend in the traditional sense. You see, this chick is very high tech (as evidenced by the fact that she offered to be my girlfriend over e-mail). So this is an offer for a cyber girlfriend, but we need to learn to crawl before we walk. I'm sure we'll end up meeting in real life if this cyber thing works out as I suspect it will. Still don't believe me? Well, read 'em and weep:

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To: mrblack629@yahoo.com

From: "Mario Lancaster" mariolancasterfmym@yahoo.com

Cc: 19 recipients, including Oscar de La Jolla's Yahoo Mail address

Subject: hi

i'd love to be your cyber girlfriend:)i'll make your fantasies come true at www-nikaok-com switch - to .

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If I may wax poetic for a moment, what I love most about this chick is how her emoticon smile just lights up the room... but wait! Fuck! I just realized that I was only cc'ed on this message, and that the offer was made to some jackhole named "mrblack629". So this chick is just rubbing my nose in the fact that she's going to be cyber-boning Mr. Black629. Fine. See if I care, slut. You've probably already boned Messrs. Black #1 through #628, and are just working your way up the line. I don't want anything to do with your tramp ass. Go back to your home on Whore Island. And come to think of it, I don't want to have any sort of sex, cyber or otherwise, with any chick named "Mario Lancaster". Even if he/she/it works at Asia SF and can cover Cher's Believe with the best of 'em.
Yahoo Mail's spam filters really need some work.